Chapter Thirty-three Summary: - Chapter Thirty-three Summary - As Merdwin and the Priestesses work to
keep Kataya alive, Daniel has a discussion with Kataya's daughter, Gwennetha, that causes him do some
serious thinking about his attitude towards Lantash.  Lantash and Daniel come to terms with their feelings about
one another and the fact that they love the same women.  They begin to build the foundation for a deep and
serious future relationship.  (This will become very important in the future.) Kataya and Lantash finally come to
terms with the need for their "divorce," and say good-bye as only true lovers can.  

Igisadonis Animawyn - Beloved of My Soul
Aima Coeurawyn - Blood of My Heart
Sevesh Lok Twin - Rite of Release of an Entwining
Adorato Coeurawyn - Adored of My Heart
Amat Wyn - My Love
Coeurawyn - My Heart
Sevesh’en Twine Coeuramator - Entwining of the Heartmates
Amata Tu Semper – I Love You.  
Et Aevum –
Into/For Eternity
“Italics” – Symbiote-Host or Telepathic communications


















The group of Tok’Ra, Tau’ri, and Furling walked across a courtyard and began to climb
the steps that led to the large wooden doors.  Once they all arrived there, Gwennetha
opened one and then led them across an immense great hall, to another set of stairs, and
thence to what looked like a small room, but which was apparently a transporter of some
type.  Stepping out of the room, Jack looked out a long narrow window, and realized they
were near the top of the structure.  They walked down another immense high domed hall
to more large wooden doors that she opened and then motioned them to enter.  

Seated inside, on a comfortable looking sofa, was Daniel; however, he looked anything but
comfortable.  He sat with his elbows on his knees and his bent head resting in his hands.  
Sam sat next to him and slowly rubbed his back.  Martouf stood behind them looking
somewhat lost and very much alone.  It was obvious that he was under a great deal of
emotional distress, as were the other two people in the room.  As they entered, they heard
Daniel saying, “Sam, Lantash needs you more than I do.  Please, go to him.  You are his
mate, and I really will be all right, I promise you.  Go on, go.”

“That is what you always say, Daniel,” Jack said, as he made his way over to his friend.  
“And what is even more astonishing is that you always are.”  

Now that Jack was here, Sam promptly got up and made her way to Lantash.  She had
been dividing her time between the two of them, trying to comfort both.  When one
requested she see to the other, she had gone to them, and somehow, they each had
seemed to draw both strength and comfort from her.  She was relieved that Jack and Teal’
c were finally here.  She could safely leave Daniel to them.  Coming up to Martouf, she
placed her arms around him and gave him a brief, hard hug.  “Merdwin said, she will be
all right, Lantash,” she tried to reassure him through Martouf.

Lantash took control, replying, “No thanks to me.  If it were not for Martouf, I would have
let Daniel kill me.  At least then, she would be free and not slowly bleeding to death,” he
said, his voice bitter with regret.

Samantha sighed.  She really could not dispute what he said.  If he had agreed sooner
this would not have happened.  Although, perhaps Kat should have told him she was
bleeding.  Of course, telling him would have been against her principles of choice free
from pressure.  She sighed again, “Kat chose this path, Lantash.  She would not thank
you for beating yourself up.”

He smiled down at her briefly, “No, she would not, but she is not here to berate me, so you
must do it for her,
Coeurawyn.”

“And I will,” Sam sighed, as she rested her head against his chest.  They stood quietly,
each lost in their own thoughts, as they took comfort from one another.  Sam rubbed
circles on Martouf’s back, much as she had Daniel’s a short time ago.  For some reason,
that simple gesture was comforting.  Perhaps, she thought, because it was a gesture used
by mothers to quiet their infants and young children.  It was odd how we seemed to take
such things with us into adulthood.  Rocking oneself for comfort was another thing Sam
thought perhaps harked back to childhood and a mother’s comfort.  Of course, that did
not explain why it was also soothing to the symbiote, unless it comforted them through the
host, which, she supposed, was possible.

“Daniel, what happened, do you know?  All Janet was able to tell us was that Kataya had
started bleeding, and that Lantash has agreed to do the
Sevesh Lok Twin thingy,” Jack
said, trying to figure out just what had taken place that had caused them all to end up
here.  “What happened when you got here?  What was Merdwin saying?”

“She has known she was running out of time, Jack.  Even her father said she needed to do
something about it soon.  Merdwin didn’t say a lot, only that he thought she would be all
right, but,” Daniel stopped speaking, and shook his head.  “She was so pale, Jack.  She
looked as if all her blood had drained out of her.  There was so much blood,” he
whispered.  “I could not tell if she was breathing when we got here, and I could not hold
her.  Merdwin said that the only thing keeping her alive was his life force, and if I took her
from him, she would die,” he continued, his voice harsh with pain.  

“If Merdwin said he thought she would be all right, then you probably don’t have anything
to be worried about.  He is sharp, Daniel, and he knows their abilities; you know, what
they can and can’t survive.  Maybe you should be a little more optimistic.  It sounds like
he knew what he was doing,” Jack said, latching onto the most upbeat portion of what he
had heard.

“You did not see his face, Jack, or hers.”  Suddenly overcome with intense emotion, Daniel
was on his feet and heading for the door.  As he passed through, out into the hall,
Gwennetha motioned the others to stay, and she followed him out.  This man was her
mother’s
Beloved, the mate of her Soul.  She firmly believed her mother was not going to
die at this time.  Kataya the Warrior had a purpose she had yet to fulfill, if she understood
the information imparted by Merdwin correctly, and she believed that she did.  
Furthermore, she arrived alive, and it was very rare for someone to pass after arriving at
the Sanctuary.

Therefore, it was up to her to reassure the
Beloved One and comfort him, as well as try to
stop the anger she felt coming from him, which was directed toward her mother’s mate.  
She sighed.  How complicated her mother’s life had become.  Watching the grief descend
upon the young man’s features, she went to him to give what comfort she could.

“Daniel,” she said, softly.  He spun away from the window he had been gazing out and
turned to her.  She looked so much like her mother; it took his breath away for a moment.

“You look like your mother,” he said the first thought that came to him.

“So my mirror tells me,” she affirmed, in her soft tranquil voice.  “You are my mother’s
Beloved,” she continued.  “You grieve, and yet nothing has happened for you to grieve
over.  Do not lose yourself to your fear and sorrow.”

“What?  How can you say that?  Your mother is dying,” Daniel, pointed out harshly,
remembering the pale, still figure that Merdwin had carried in here and with which he
had then disappeared.  As he had told Jack, he was not even sure she had still been
breathing.

“Her life force was not extinguished, Daniel,” Gwennetha reassured him.  “She is with the
priestesses, and even more importantly, Merdwin is also with her.  I believe you are
familiar with the saying
where there is life there is hope.  Surely, you do not believe my
mother would leave you or this space in time, easily.  She has much yet to do in this life.  
She will return to you,” she told him with conviction.

“How can you be so calm?  So, so, unemotional?  Don’t you care?”  He demanded.

Moving closer to him, she touched his arm, and he felt her touch his mind briefly before
withdrawing.  He frowned.  She had not read his mind, simply touched it.

“My mother once told me that you had a beautiful soul.  She spoke truth.”  Turning, she
walked to one of the window seats and motioned him to join her there.  “Many can see the
unicorn, but few can feed it.  My mother, as you are well aware, is one of the few.  You,
also, have always been able to walk amongst them at will and without fear.”

“What is that supposed to mean?”  He asked, tersely.  

“You do not remember, but you will,” she sighed, and then answered his earlier questions.

“Daniel, I am calm because a storm does not rage here when there is no need of rain.  I
am unemotional because, soon, it will be my time to sustain my mother and work to heal
her.  If I use my energy to become distraught over her, then I cannot function to help her,”
she pointed out.

“There is a message in there for me, isn’t there?”  He asked quietly.

“Only if you see one,” came the soft reply.  “I care deeply, but my mother will not be gone
from us forever if she dies.  We will be together again.  My caring is more for the man who
stands and feels alone, although his mate and his friends surround him.  The man who
simply took his vows to be so binding that he had to work to convince himself that not
only was he allowed to break them, but also that he should do so.  The man, whose
only
true transgression,
was to love my mother enough to join with her and give her eighty
years of happiness.  For they were very happy together, Daniel; you should neither envy,
nor begrudge them that happiness.  Lantash is not to blame for this anymore than my
mother is to blame for it.  It has happened, and now we deal with the consequences.”  

She smiled slightly and laughed gently as she said, in perfect imitation of Kataya,
“Gwennetha, it does not matter how large or small the action, there are consequences.  Be
sure you wish to deal with them before you commit the action, because you shall have to do
so.  No matter what path you choose, you will have to deal with what you find at the end,
as well as what you find along the way.
 I wish I knew how many times I have heard that
from her lips.”  Sighing gently, she said, “I am trying to tell you that she was aware of the
consequences of her actions, and she was willing to pay the price.  Do not dishonor her by
belittling what she was trying to do.”

Daniel looked at his mate’s daughter and saw her mother again, not in her features this
time, but in her attitude and beliefs.  This could have been Kataya talking to him.

“You are telling me to forgive Lantash, and stop blaming him because Kataya chose this
path herself,” he said.

“Yes, I am,” she said frankly.

“I don’t know if I can.  She was trying to do the right thing.  I am not sure he was,” Daniel
rubbed his temples, as he thought about what she had said.  Sighing himself, he turned
to face her and said as straightforwardly as he could, “I keep asking myself, why?  Why
didn’t he just agree to it once he realized that Sam was his Soulmate?  Why did he insist
on staying entwined with Kataya?”

“You have not remembered the rites, have you?  The joining and entwining?”

“No.  No, I have not.  I have tried, and I have had impressions, but I have not been able to
actually remember what they entail completely,” he agreed, in his honest way.

“Perhaps that is where the answer lies, at least in part,” she told him, softly.

“Kataya went through the same rites he did, and she was ready to do it,” Daniel replied
directly.

“She had much time to grow accustomed to the idea.  Do not forget that she knew many
months ago that you were her Soulmate, and that if Lantash still lived and was near, she
would have to go through the
Sevesh Lok Twin.  He has only had a day or so to come to
that conclusion.  I also believe that there is no one all-encompassing  reason, but a
myriad of reasons, which all touch on one another, as to why things have happened as
they have.  You must understand that for Lantash, it was neither black nor yet white and
his thoughts have, no doubt, had trouble integrating all of the threads, to come up with a
cohesive picture in order to choose a path.  I believe my mother understood this to be so,
else she would not have been so patient.”

Daniel leaned back and shut his eyes, “Of course.  It had not even occurred to me.”

“Lantash is a good man,
a special being, Daniel,” she said earnestly.  “He has done
nothing wrong.  He loves my mother, as you love his Samantha.  Perhaps you should try
reversing the positions.  You are the one entwined with Samantha, whom you have not
seen for over one hundred years.  Whom you love and will always love.  I think it would
take your heart time to realize that the love would always remain, that releasing the
entwining would not destroy it,” she pointed out.

Daniel nodded, and then stood, “I need to go make an apology.  Sam understood it; why
didn’t I?”  He murmured, almost to himself.

“Samantha had the benefit of the link with my mother.  She was able to feel and
comprehend the emotions, so she knew what Lantash was feeling.  That is all.”

As he held out his hand to her, she placed hers in it and came gracefully to her feet.  
Leaning forward, she kissed him gently, and said, “She will survive this, Daniel; I have
great faith in her.  Remember that she loves you greatly, and that she will fight to live for
you now that you are together again.”  She smiled slightly before continuing, “Moreover,
she is at the Sanctuary and she has Merdwin with her.  I am not sure she could pass from
us even if she wished to do so, not with those two very important circumstances ranged
against her.”  

“Now, go back inside and help Lantash.  After all, you have much in common, for you both
love the same women.  That alone should forge a bond between you.  Each of you is
completely capable of understanding how the other feels, for you feel the same things
yourself,” she reminded him.

Daniel nodded decisively, “You are right.  I have some fence mending to do.”  He paused,
looking at her, “Thank you.  You are very like her, you know.”

“So I am told,” she responded, with a wider smile.  “Now go and do what you can for him.  
He, too, is my mother’s mate, and she loves him.  As such, he deserves our respect and
understanding.  I believe that you have understanding in abundance, and I know that
your honesty will insist that you give him the respect he deserves.”

He smiled slightly as he nodded, turned, and re-entered the room.




Daniel quietly joined the group now clustered around the sofa and chairs.  He hesitated
for a moment, as everyone looked at him, but then he looked directly at Martouf, and said,
“I would like to talk to you outside, if you don’t mind.  There are some window seats where
we can be comfortable,” he said mildly.

Martouf nodded briefly and, without a word, turned to accompany Daniel into the
hallway.  “Daniel, don’t…” Sam began to say.

“I am not going to.  I need to talk to Lantash, just us.”  He looked at her earnestly, as he
said, “It is important, Sam, to both of us, maybe to all of us.  I promise you that when I
said talk, talk is exactly what I meant.”  

“All right, Daniel,” Sam said.  She had always trusted him before, and there was no
reason to stop.  He had never lied to her, and he would not start now, she knew.

Once outside in the hallway, Daniel led the way to the window seat that he and
Gwennetha had just vacated.  As they seated themselves, he leaned forward, resting his
forearms on his knees, his hands dangling between them.  Lantash sat quietly, waiting for
him to say something.

“As much as I would like to blame you for this, it is not your fault,” Daniel said suddenly.  
“It is not your fault; it is not Kataya’s fault.  Both of you were doing what you considered
the right thing.  Kataya was willing to accept the consequences, and we have to be too.”  
Sitting up straight, he looked directly at Lantash, “Do you understand what I am saying?”

“No, I do not.  I am obviously to blame.  My refusal caused it.  If I had simply agreed to do
it, we would not all be sitting here now, waiting to see if she will live, or die,” Lantash
replied, his voice harsh with bitterness and regret.  It was obvious that he had taken the
full blame that Daniel had laid on him.

“No, we might be burying you instead; not a viable alternative in my opinion.  Kataya
would have blamed herself, and Sam would have been in despair, lost and alone.”  Daniel
shook his head.  “That would not have been a better outcome.  Besides,” he added, “We
are all assuming she is going to die, and as Gwennetha pointed out to me, she has not
died, and we are all lamenting something that not only may not, but in all probability, will
not happen.  Every one of us is expecting the worst, and that may not be what comes to
pass at all.  Kataya is not one to give up easily, and I don’t believe she is ready to leave
this time and space just yet,” he repeated Gwennetha’s words, feeling they were very true
of Kataya.  He smiled wryly as he continued, “Then too, she also pointed out to me that we
are at the Sanctuary, and Merdwin is with her.  In her opinion, Kataya could not die even
if she wanted to.  I am choosing to place my trust in Gwennetha, rather than my runaway
imagination.”  

Turning completely serious once again, he said to him, “Look, Lantash, all I am saying is
that I don’t think you should blame yourself, and I had no right to blame you either.  I am
sorry I hit you; I was out of line.”  As he looked at Lantash, he realized that he had a badly
bruised face consisting of an eye that was turning deep purple, and a jaw and cheek that
were going to be a perfect color match if he did not do something to stop it.  Frowning as
he realized this, he asked, “By the way, why haven’t you healed the bruises on your face?  
They look very painful, and I am sorry.”  He paused for a moment before adding, almost
humorously, “I am also surprised.  You must have allowed that to happen because I doubt
very much I could have managed to land more than one punch otherwise,” Daniel said,
acknowledging Lantash’s superior strength.

Lantash sent Daniel a sardonic look, “Martouf insists that I leave it to heal on its own,
slowly and painfully, as a reminder to me of what I have caused.  I did not argue with him
about it.  He is upset enough over what has happened.  Do not forget that, just as the two
of us love Kataya, Martouf is also coming to do so.  Needless to say, he is extremely
distressed.  Moreover, you are correct; I did allow it at first, until I realized I had no right
to do that to Martouf.”  

“And, although you may not realize that I was serious earlier, when I told you that you
could kill me if Kataya died, he is well aware that I was very much in earnest,” Lantash
answered.  The grimness in his voice alerted Daniel to the fact that he was, indeed,
serious.

“Well, that is not going to happen, so he can stop worrying about it, and you can stop
thinking I would even consider it.  As for leaving the bruises, that is all well and good, but
the thing is that it is going to upset Kataya.  She is going to be upset enough with both of
us for arguing, without throwing a visual reminder at her that it actually went beyond
argument to physical violence.  And I know it is selfish, but since
I am the one that
attacked
you, I really don’t want her reminded of it any more than necessary, y’know?”  
Daniel said firmly.

Tilting his head as if listening, he said, “Martouf and I had not considered that.  Neither of
us wish to cause her, or you, any more distress than we already have, so I will begin to
work on it at once.”

“I think you waited too long,
Adorato Coeurawyn, for I have seen it, and Daniel spoke the
truth.  However, contrary to what you both expect, since you have obviously punished
each other already, I will say no more about it.”  Both men jumped to their feet and spun
around at the sound of Kataya’s voice coming to them from farther down the great hall.  As
she walked toward them, both noticed how pale her usually golden skin was.  It was
obvious that she had bathed, and she had on a clean gown, so there was no outward sign
of what had occurred.

Reaching them, she let her hand lay softly against Lantash’s skin over one bruise and
then the other.  “Now you may finish the healing process, Lantash,” she said gently.

“You took the pain,” he said softly, “Why?”

“Because you do not deserve to feel it any more than I do.  Daniel is correct in that also,
Amat Wyn, for you are not at fault, and neither am I.  You came to the decision on your
own, without knowing of the bleeding, so I am hoping you are truly ready to go through
the
Sevesh Lok Twin.”

“Kataya, do the others know that you are all right?”  Daniel asked.

“Merdwin should be with them by now.  Please remember to thank him and Samantha,
Daniel, for without their help things might have turned out differently,” she said warmly,
realizing he was intending to leave her and Lantash alone.

“I will.  We will wait for you inside.  Kataya, take the time you need, if you can.  I will tell
Sam,” Daniel nodded decisively, as he turned to go back into the room.  Just before
entering it, he turned to Lantash, “Listen to her, and know that I, too, understand what
you are feeling, just as Sam does.  We will see you both after while.”  

Lantash looked bewildered, as he turned to Kataya, saying, “I do not believe I
understand.  What did Daniel mean?”  

Kataya looked at him and turning toward the room they had arrived in, she said, “I
believe that he just indicated that we should take some time together before we say good-
bye to the part of us, which we have agreed we must release.  
A lover’s good-bye, so to
speak.  Come, Lantash, walk with me, and we shall say goodbye as lovers that we may be
reborn as loving friends.  Come.”

Stepping inside the room from the hall, Lantash was surprised to find himself in a
garden.  As he looked around, he realized they were in the garden they had often walked
in before.  He stepped forward and followed her silently down a path that he did not
remember.  At the end of the path, the forest started.  Standing at its edge was a large
unicorn.  He watched as Kataya moved to it, offered it something, took a golden bridle
from the garden wall, and threw it over the animal’s head.  Leading it to some steps, she
mounted and then turned to him.

“Come,
Adorato Coeurawyn, and we shall ride the wind and dance in the fire for the last
time as lovers.”

As if in a trance, Lantash followed her, mounted behind her, and clasped her waist.  She
released the reins, the unicorn bounded forward, and soon it did seem as if they were
riding the wind, although they never left the ground.  All too soon, it was over, and they
were in a beautiful wooded glen.  Dropping the reins to the ground, they dismounted, and
Kataya removed the bridle, allowing the animal to graze.  She turned to Lantash and led
him into the gazebo that was there.

Standing in the center of it in a circle on the floor, she took his hands, placed them at her
waist, and placed her hands on his chest.  Closing her eyes and throwing her head back,
she began to summon the fire.  It was not the sweet gentle fire she had shared with Daniel
just the day before, but the raging passionate fire of lovers who knew each other well and
reveled in one another.  

And so, they stood as the fire took them to completion, and as it died, Lantash stood with
his head bowed and his breathing ragged.  “I had forgotten.  Why?”  He asked, almost
helplessly, trying to understand.

“Hush,
Adorato Coeurawyn, for it is over at last, and we have joined for the final time.  
The next time you experience the fire, it will be with Samantha, as it should be, and I
shall be with Daniel, also as it should be.”

“Why did you do this?”  He asked her.  

“Because it will allow you to know that I will always have you in my heart, as I will always
be in yours.  You did nothing wrong, in waiting to decide, Lantash.  Our love is a mighty
one, full of passion and desire.  We have always known that it was one of the most intense
of the Heartmate bindings.”  Taking his hand, she said, “Come, let us sit, for there are
things you should know, and now that you have agreed to the releasing rite, I will tell you.”

As they sat on the seat and faced one another, hands locked together she began, “We
talked of Soulmates and Dayillon, when we were together, but you should know how that
pertains to us.  You know some of this story, but let me tell it from the beginning, please.”

Looking into the past, she said, “In my first living, I fell in love with a young man named
Dayillon.  Our souls knew one another, and we became lovers and bonded as Soulmates
do.  For millennia, our souls sought and found one another, although each of us had other
lovers during the
lonely times.”

“These others were lovers, and they were cared about, but
most were never deeply loved.
Then a terrible thing happened.  One living, I was to have kits, and Dayillon and I were
attacked.  I lost the kits, and Dayillon blamed himself.  He went after those that had
caused this, and in the ensuing battle, he died, and after taking my revenge, I too, died.  
When I was reborn, I waited long years for my love, but still he was not there.  He never
returned to me.”  

“Centuries passed, and one day I met a wonderful man and his symbiote, and they came
to love me deeply.  The more we were together, the more love I had for them, until our love
became as a living thing.  Never in the three hundred years since Dayillon’s death, had I
loved so very much, and since I had come to believe Dayillon was never coming back, I
thought to take the lover as a Soulmate.  In the end, I thought better of it, but still chose
to entwine with my Heartmate, to bind myself to him in the ways of the entwining rites of
my people, and to be bound to him always, into eternity.  And we were happy.”  

Smiling gently, she said to him, “We were happy, Lantash, and for those years, I am so
grateful.  I was truly blessed, when I found you to love me, for once your love is given, you
do not abandon that love lightly or quickly.  And neither do I.”  

“What I am trying to tell you is that the binding we went through was very intense.  When
the priest entwined our blood and our auras, extra twists and bindings appeared that
should not have.  Neither of us could have prevented the tightness of the binding, we
loved so very deeply.  I am so sorry for the pain it has caused and may yet cause you, for
truly you do not deserve it.  Therefore, you see, it is not your fault that this has
happened.  This is simply another reason it is so much more difficult for us to part than
perhaps it should be.”  Taking a deep breath, she told him, “There is also the Prophecy to
take into consideration.  Had Daniel and I never parted, you and I would not have met
and thus we would not yet be approaching the Great Battle.  What we had and what we
still have was meant to be.  We were meant to be deeply and eternally in love.  I do not
regret a single moment that we were together, Lantash, and I never will.”  

Lantash nodded briefly, before saying, “I believe you may be correct.  It, too, could be
making our parting harder to accomplish than it would be in a normal binding.”  He
hesitated for a moment and then very quietly he asked, “Dominic?”   

Nodding, she acknowledged, “Yes, Dominic’s soul threads do not help at all.  They too,
have caused you to question the breaking of our vows and bound us even more tightly to
one another.Do you understand why you must not blame yourself anymore, Lantash,
Amat Wyn?”

Looking down at their entwined hands, he thought of how their hearts were so entwined
with one another.  His voice husky and low, he said, “Yes, I think I do.  Will we—will we
truly, always, love each other, Kataya?”

“For eternity,
Igisadonis Animawyn, Beloved of my soul.

“You have never called me that,” he said on a quickly indrawn breath, as he raised his
head with a jerk.  “That is only for the Soulmate.”

“No, I have not, and
I never will again.  Nevertheless, know in your heart, between us, that
one time I did call you that, for that is what you shall always be to me, and I have always
called you so in my heart.  My love for you, Lantash, is truly eternal.  I would die for you
today, as easily as I would have died for you all those years ago.”

“You almost did.”

“Yes.”

“What have I done to deserve that two such women love me so?  I do not understand,” he
whispered.  

Kataya chanted a short soft tone, and immediately, the unicorn appeared.  She placed
something in Lantash’s hand, and said, “Feed it to him.”  Once the animal had eaten it,
he tossed his head and moved away to start to graze again.

“I do not understand,” Lantash said.

“Only the pure of heart can feed the unicorn, Lantash.  You thought you rode it because of
me, but you could ride him in your own right.  Daniel, also, has the ability, for his soul is
pure and beautiful.”  

“I am not pure of heart, Kataya.  I have wicked thoughts and urges; I am not untouched,”
Lantash said quietly.

“Pure of heart, in the manner that we mean it, is simply a way of saying that you strive
always to do that which is right and good.  We all have evil thoughts, Lantash, but the test
is whether we follow through with them, or let them die within us.  And if you mean you
are
not untouched as in being a virgin, then I can tell you truly, that is a myth that should
never have grown around the lusty unicorn.”  

“You and Daniel both strive to do that which is right, and in so doing your hearts are
pure.  Truth is purity, Lantash.  Striving to see beneath the surface is truth.  
Furthermore, you have always been truthful to yourself, if not always to others.  Daniel
and I are the same, and Samantha has learned through her life lessons to be so, also.  I
know I am not explaining this well, but believe me, Lantash, there is something in both
you and Daniel that is good, pure, and incorruptible; that something is rare, and it is to
be treasured when it is found.”  

“That is what makes Samantha and I love the two of you so very much, so much that
either of us would die for either of you.  It will always be this way, into eternity, now that
Samantha has come into her own.  And you love her more than life itself, do you not?”   

“Yes, you are correct in what you say of my feelings for Samantha.  I truly do not think I
would wish to continue living without her.”  

Kataya’s voice was intense with emotion, as she answered him, “Should something
happen to Samantha, you must promise me that you will not give in to your sorrow.  You
must continue to live on, and you must promise me that you will see to it that Daniel,
also, lives on should something happen to me.  It is important that you promise me this,
Tash.”  He frowned, as he sensed the urgency in her.

“I do not understand.  Why do you wish that I promise you this?”  He asked.

“Please, just believe that it is important that you both continue to live.  You must
continue.”    

He was puzzled, but he could tell that this was very important to her, so he gave her his
word.  If anything should happen to either of them, he, Martouf, and Daniel would go on
alone.

“Though I have said this to you before, I wish to tell you one last time.  As a lover, a
Heartmate, and with the depth of the Soulmate between us, I say only to you; Dayillon will
always be the true mate of my soul.  He is my first love, and he will be my last, if the day
ever comes that eternity is not endless.  But, the love I hold for you in my heart, shall also
beat forevermore.  
Amata Tu Semper.  Et Aevum, Lantash, my truly much loved and adored
one.
”  Then, softly and gently, she asked, “Are you ready now, Adorato Coeurawyn?  Shall
we break the passionate bond that ties us, so that we may revel in the loves that await us
both?”  

Standing and holding his hand out to her, he said, “Yes.  I am ready now.  Truly ready, I
believe.”  He began to turn away, but something within his heart drew him back.  
“Aima
Coeurawyn, Blood of my heart,
I too, will always hold you in my heart in this way, as I
always have, though
never will I call you so again.  Amata Tu Semper, Coeurawyn, Et
Aevum.”

Smiling at him through her tears, she nodded her understanding, turned, and led the
way to the center of the gazebo.  Lantash was surprised to find himself in the same small
room that had whisked them away and to the garden.




Waiting for them, was the group they left behind.  Stepping forward and bringing herself
into Daniel’s waiting arms, she turned to them and said, “Merdwin, we are ready to
participate in the
Sevesh Lok Twin.  We must begin the preparations.”

Merdwin bowed and suggested, “I think another session with the priestesses first would be
advisable.”

“Yes, I agree.”  Taking Daniel’s hand, she turned to the others and said, “You will all be
shown to apartments where you may refresh yourselves, and you will each be given a
change of clothing or a robe to wear in case you wish to attend the rite of
Sevesh Lok Twin.”

Merdwin nodded, and turning to Lantash said, “You will need to go through the ritual
cleansing.  We will provide you with the proper raiment, and our own people will perform
the pre-rite rituals.  You must have witnesses to stand by with you.  We can provide
priests who would be capable of helping you should it become necessary.  I myself would
stand for you, if I was not performing the rite, and if you wish for that, then another of our
high priests or priestesses could fill in for me,” Merdwin offered.

“That will not be necessary, Merdwin, but I do thank you for the offer.  I believe that both
Kataya and I would prefer that you do the actual performance of the rite,” Lantash said,
firmly.  “However, I am not sure exactly what the witness must do, so I need to be
informed before I can choose who I wish to stand with me.”

Merdwin and Kataya exchanged glances, before Kataya said, “The witnesses are there for
two reasons.  The first is to be witness to the cutting of the ties, to be able to attest to the
fact that it was indeed finished with both participants still conscious and aware.  The
second is to be support for you if the pain becomes too intense.  If that happens, then
some of the pain will transfer to them to allow you to remain conscious and complete the
ritual.  I am afraid that you cannot appoint or choose your witnesses, Lantash.  They must
volunteer, since there is physical pain involved. However the second part will not pertain
to your witnesses, so for you that part is irrelevant.”  

“To allow you to remain conscious, as in, the pain is so intense you pass out?”  Jacob
asked.

“Yes,” Merdwin replied.  “I am afraid it can be quite painful when the entwined strands of
their blood are cut.  It is an
archaic and ancient rite that comes to us from the Myst-time.

“It will not matter for them, Merdwin,” Kataya said again.  

Turning to her, he said, “I believe you should allow Lantash to accept some of the pain,
Kataya.  You are too weak to bear all of it.”  

Her voice grim, she replied, “Weak or not, I, and I alone, will bear the pain as is my
responsibility and right.”

“Your right?”  Jack asked, his voice edged with disbelief.  

“Yes, Colonel, as the one requesting the sundering of our bindings through
Sevesh Lok
Twin
it is my responsibility to accept the pain of the separation.  Lantash did not ask for
this, and Martouf certainly had nothing to do with it.  The mate has no responsibility to
share any part of the pain, as long as they agree to the rite.”

“Is that true, Merdwin?”  Daniel asked quietly.

“Yes, it is.  I know what you are thinking, Daniel, but there is nothing I can do about it.  
Those are the laws surrounding the rite.”

“Do I have no say in this?”  Lantash asked suddenly.  “Do I have no choice?”

“No, I am afraid not.  It is solely my decision,” Kataya said firmly.

“Kataya.”

“Merdwin.  No.  You know how I feel about this.”

“Yes, I know,” he said, his voice more grim than hers had been.

“Kataya, may I speak to you, please?  Alone?”  Lantash suddenly spoke up.

She looked at him, for a moment, and then agreed.  “This way,” she said, as she turned
and walked to a door that led into the sanctuary and from there into a small alcove where
they could sit and look out upon the magnificent view.

“What do you wish to say, Lantash?  You know me well enough to know that I feel very
strongly about this.  It is my responsibility to accept the pain of the parting.  The
emotional pain you are going through is enough.”

“Kataya, what is the real reason?  Why will you not allow me to share this with you?”

“Do you not think I have put you through enough pain?”  She asked quietly.

“And do you not think that I have put you through enough pain?  I can answer by asking
since we shared equally in all of the pain in our past.  You were as devastated by our
parting as I, and you mourned your loss of me, as I mourned my loss of you.”  He stopped
speaking suddenly only to begin once more, but in a very strained, distraught tone of
voice, “Do you not think that as your mate, I should be allowed to choose whether or not I
will bear part of the pain?”  Kataya watched, as Lantash suddenly swallowed almost
convulsively, and she gasped, when she saw how he was fighting his intense emotions.

“Lantash, please, do not,” she said, in an anguished tone.

“I cannot sit by, and watch you bear by yourself, something that we are both responsible
for.  Please, do not force me to do this, Kataya, for I do not think I could watch you in pain
and not be able to do something to help.  If we both bear it, then our witnesses will have
less to deal with, will they not?  What is the real reason?  I know that you would have
allowed me to share in it before and accepted it as something that we would do for one
another.  We have always shared both good and bad.  Tell me, please, why you will not
allow me to share this with you.”

“You are correct, Lantash, I would have allowed you to share in the pain had we decided
to endure the
Sevesh when we first parted.  However, you are forgetting that there is an
innocent party now involved.  If it was Dominic, or even Justin, I would allow you to take
at least some of it, but Martouf asked for none of this.  He has no reason to wish to be put
through this, and I cannot do that to him.”

“Let me have control, please, Lantash,” Martouf requested.

“Are you sure?  I can tell her how you feel about it.”

“No, I believe I should be the one to tell her,”
Martouf insisted.

Kataya watched as Lantash gave way to Martouf and he looked at her with softness in his
blue-gray eyes, “You are forgetting that we love as one.  What Lantash feels, I feel, and
what I feel, Lantash feels.  I share his wishes in this, Kataya.  You and I have had very
little time together, but I have learned a great deal about you from Lantash, and I fully
understand and share his desires and wishes.  Please do not put both of us through the
agony of watching you enduring what must be a very painful event, simply because I am
not Dominic.”

Kataya looked at him for a long moment, and then she surprised them both with a request
they had not expected.  “May I search your heart and mind for your true feelings?  If I find
you are telling me the truth, then I will allow it.”

“Yes.  I am willing,” Martouf said at once.  

“And Lantash, is he willing also?”  Kataya asked quietly.

“I am, Kataya,” Lantash said, as he once again resumed control.”

He closed his eyes and waited for her to enter his mind.  He felt her, light as a butterfly.  
He smiled slightly to himself, and she answered his thought almost before he formed it.
 “I
almost became an agent after we parted, as it would have suited me to be in dangerous
positions, but I was needed in other duties, so I never went any farther with it.  However, I
thank you for the compliment.”

“You are welcome.  Your touch is very light, almost non-existent.  You would have made a
good agent.”

“I am finished, Lantash, Martouf.  You both spoke the truth.”  Still, she was having trouble
accepting them sharing in it.

“Kataya, please.  Do not shut us out of this.  You saw for yourself that we want to do this.  
Do not deny us,” Lantash said softly.

Sighing, Kataya agreed, “All right.  I suppose it is only fair, since we both participated in
the entwining.  We will share this, also.”  She continued saying, “You must prepare
yourself.”  

She hesitated, for a moment, then asked, “May I please talk to Martouf again?”

“Of course, but do not try to frighten him,
Amat Wyn.  He is not easy to intimidate,” he
gave her a chiding look, before letting Martouf take control.

“Martouf, I want you to know that what I feel for Lantash,” she sighed slightly, “I love you,
also.  I am afraid it is inevitable, for you are part of Lantash, and Lantash is part of you.  I
hope that does not make you uncomfortable.”

“No.  No, it does not.  I find it strange, that I can love Samantha so deeply, and yet, have
such intense emotions for you.  It has, however, helped me to understand the confusion
that Samantha felt, when she was left loving a man she had never seen.”  He paused for a
moment, before saying, “I am finding it,
difficult—to stay—unemotional about you and it is
somewhat disconcerting.  I find myself loving you and responding to your nearness.”

“It will only get worse until we do the
Sevesh Lok Twin.  I asked to speak to you because I
wish you to understand what is going to happen.  Do you, have you, has Lantash shown
the rite of entwining to you so that you know what it was and how it was performed?”

“Yes, he has.  I found it to be quite beautiful and profoundly moving.”

Kataya nodded her acknowledgement of his statement, but refused to give into the tears
his statement had caused.  She pushed her emotions aside, once again, and continued
with what she felt he needed to know, “The rite of Sevesh Lok Twin is the sundering of
those ties of blood.  It will be very painful, for the blood will once again come forth, and it
will become a solid intricately tied cord.  We must free the blood so that it will return to its
original home and, as I said, it will be painful.  You should be sure to talk to Merdwin
before the rite itself.  He will tell you what to expect.  Once we sever the blood tie, it will
mute the passionate bond and therefore it is easy to refuse and ignore it.  You will have to
decide if you wish to keep the aural binding.  I, personally, would prefer that we keep it,
but if you feel you do not wish too, then when the time comes, simply refuse to keep it.”

“We also choose to keep it, Kataya,” Martouf said, softly.  Looking into her amazing
amethyst eyes, he reached out slowly and caressed her cheek.  Shaking his head, he said,
“I believe that the love we will share will be a wondrous thing, completely different from
anything I have ever experienced.  Is that a true understanding?”

“Yes, it will be totally different than any love you have ever or will ever know.  It will be—
platonic, for the most part, after the
Sevesh Lok Twin, though our passion will never
completely die.”  She paused as she considered what she should explain to him, however,
she realized that both of them had the right to know this.  “The love we share shall be
deep and abiding, with no beginning and no end.  I believe you will be much more
comfortable with it than what you are experiencing now,” she assured him, softly.  Then
she cleared her throat and continued saying, “However, I also believe that you and
Lantash both have the right to be informed and to have this knowledge of the Furling.”  

Gathering both her courage and her thoughts she told them bluntly, “Lantash, Dominic,
and I remained with the Tok’Ra, and thus we never lived among my people.”  

Once more she paused and as she did so, Martouf smiled slightly, saying, “Whatever it is
that you wish to tell us cannot be terrible, Kataya.  The Furling are a much respected, and
honored people by those who are their allies and much respected and feared by those who
are their enemies.  If there were something truly terrible about them, or their society, the
respect would not remain year after year and century after century.  Please, simply tell us
what it is you believer that we should know.”  

She nodded, and then stated it baldly, “The sexual pull between us will never go
completely away.  It will always remain, much muted, but there nonetheless.”  She
stopped as she saw the shock on his face before he could control his reaction.  She
sighed.  “I knew it would shock you, as I do not believe that Lantash ever realized what
our Heartmates actually meant to us.  Martouf, unlike many in the universe, it is not
unknown for a Soulmate pair to welcome a Heartmate into their bed, particularly if a
Soulmate reappears while his mate is mated to a Heartmate.  Were we living in
Cadwaellon, instead of on Earth,
if we all wished for it to be, no one would consider it
strange if we joined with our Heartmates.  It does not always happen, however, neither is
it so uncommon as to be noteworthy.  An echo of that desire remains and can be called
forth by those involved.”  She held up her hand as he looked about to speak and
continued with the information they needed.  “It is, however, quite easy to ignore it once
the blood tie is cut asunder.  Only when those involved wish it to be resurrected, does it
come forward and roam freely.  Therefore, do not fear that you will feel the way you do
now, for you will not.”  

She frowned before saying, “Perhaps I should not have told you.”  She shook her head,
obviously disagreeing with herself.  “I did not want you to feel the desire and not
understand why it was there and fear it.  There is no need to do so.  It is often that we are
among those whose mores are much stricter, as they are on Earth.  We conform to the
society in which we find ourselves, Martouf.  You will have no trouble simply pushing it
aside should it ever appear, just as Samantha and Daniel will have no problem pushing
their desire for one another aside and ignoring it, as well.”  

She stood quietly as he and Lantash talked over this newest piece of news.  She truly
hoped they did not become overly concerned.  It was simply a fact of their lives and one
learned to live with it.  Noticing Martouf return his gaze to her, she waited for his
response.  “Actually, Kataya, it seems that Lantash was aware of the, ah, way that
Heartmates and Soulmates sometimes interacted.  It seems that Artereos told them, that
is, he told Dominic and Lantash, shortly after you bonded.  I understand that Justin,
being Wiccadian, knew before Lantash broached the subject.”  He smiled at her
reassuringly.  It was obvious that whatever Lantash told him, it put him very much at
ease with the result of the
Sevesh.  “I understand that once this tie is severed, it is the
heart-love, rather than that of the body, which takes precedence, unless there is a mutual
wish for the other to be brought forward.  I believe we are both comfortable with that.”    

As relief swept her, she gave him a slight, but warm smile, before urging him to go, “In
that case I do not believe there is anything else that you should know, at least from me.  It
is time for you to begin the rituals that must be performed before the
Sevesh can take
place.”  She hesitated, before continuing, “If you choose to allow any of your people to
stand witness for you, you must warn them that it could become very painful for them, as
well as for you.  I suspect that Merdwin will be quite graphic with them, and please insist
that he tell you exactly what to expect.  I do not wish you to be unprepared for what we
will encounter during the
Sevesh.”  She stood and held her hand out to him.  As he took it
in his and stood to follow her out of the room, she softly touched his face, smiled, and
said, “I am glad your bruises are gone, Martouf.  You will have plenty of other things for
Lantash to heal after the
Sevesh Lok Twin and you do not need those bruises on top of
that.”  She then turned and led the way from the alcove into the larger Sanctuary room.  

Seeing the four attendant priests awaiting him, she gestured that he should accompany
them, then turned and made her way back to the altar for another healing session, before
she, also, went to her own ritual cleansing before the
Sevesh Lok Twin.  

Standing in the empty chamber, she allowed the tears to come.  Tears she had refused to
shed, until now.  Tears of sorrow, for the ties that had bound her to Lantash for two
hundred years were about to be broken, and so was a part of her heart.  Why was it that
doing that which was right could seem so wrong and hurt so badly?  Wiping angrily at the
tears, she turned to call her attendants and came face to face with Sam.

“Samantha, is something wrong?”  She asked at once.

“No, I just wanted you to know that Merdwin has accepted me as one of your witnesses,
and Daniel is going to stand with Lantash.”

“Is Merdwin out of his mind?”  Kataya gasped.

“No, I don’t think so,” Sam said firmly.

“Well I do.  What in the universe was he thinking?”  Turning on Samantha suddenly, she
accused, “You and Daniel ganged up on him and simply pestered him into submission,
did you not?  Oh, Samantha, you have no idea of what is to come.  It is a very ancient and
pagan rite, and no one who participates will come out without blood on him or her, as well
as injuries.  It is inevitable.”  

“That is why most Heartmates do not choose to be formally entwined.  Most entwining of
the hearts is simply done by personal declaration, as you and Daniel did, or if it is formal,
they do an aural entwining.  It does not bind in the way of the blood tie and is not a
passionate love, but a heart-love.  I am beginning to believe that the rite of
Sevesh’en
Twine Coeuramator
of the blood should be banned.”  She sighed deeply, and appeared
stricken, before continuing, “That is not true, of course.  I do not regret entwining with
Lantash, even now.”

“Daniel and I want to do this, Kat.  We
need to do this.  I know you may not understand
that need, but that doesn’t make it any less real or legitimate,” Sam said softly.

Seeing the pleading for understanding in Sam’s eyes, suddenly, Kataya realized that she
did understand.  It was important to her, and to Daniel that they go through this with
them; they truly did have a need to share it.  “All right, Samantha, I will say no more.  I
am sorry for sounding ungrateful, and I do understand, I assure you.  I believe that I
would feel the same were the positions reversed,” she told her softly.

Sam visibly relaxed and gave her a warm, though small, smile, as she told her, “Thank
you.”   

She nodded her acknowledgement of Sam’s answer and then asked her, “Where is
Merdwin now?”  

Sam nodded to a door at the back of the room, “I think he is in there.”

“Yes, of course, he would be getting the implements ready.  You may as well go and start
getting ready.  Are there any others who are standing for me?”

“You don’t know who the others are?”  Sam asked, surprised.

“No, it is purely voluntary and, as I was talking to Lantash and Martouf, I have no idea if
anyone came forward when Merdwin asked,” She replied.

“I see.  I thought it was just a formality, I mean his asking if anyone was willing to stand
witness.  Other than myself there is Janet, Gwennetha, Garwynthia, Seraphynara,
Caliswyna…”  

Kataya broke into Sam’s recital of names to say, “Thank you, Sam, there is no need to
repeat all the names; I will see them when I enter the chamber.  However, please tell me
Merdwin did not accept Janet.”

“Yes, he did after a little persuasion.”

“This entire thing is turning into a nightmare,” Kataya said forcefully.  Sighing, she then
said softly, “Listen, go ahead with the others, and I will see you shortly.  I hope all of the
priestesses were not accepted as witnesses; there will be none left to do this next healing I
need to go through.”  Shaking her head, she walked toward the room where she knew
Merdwin would be.  Before entering it, she turned back to Sam where she still stood, a
troubled look on her face.

“Samantha, I thank you, and I thank Janet, also.  Now, stop looking so worried, and go
begin the cleansing.  I will join you soon, I promise, and I am glad that you will be with
me, truly.”

“All right, Kat, if you are sure you are okay.”

“I am
okay, I promise you.”  She turned and entered the room where Merdwin was busy
purifying her sword and dagger as well as the ritual dagger.

Merdwin knew the moment she entered the room, and he sighed deeply.  He supposed
this was his next battle.  He hoped he did not lose it, as well.  The Tau’ri were certainly an
extremely stubborn race.

“Were you graphic in your explanations, Merdwin?”  Kataya asked.

Merdwin looked at her in surprise.  She sounded normal, neither upset nor angry.  “I was
as graphic as I could be without becoming sick and embarrassing myself.  They are
determined to do this.”

“Samantha is a Warrior, and I believe she can handle this.  Janet is a healer, and just
witnessing it will be extremely difficult for her.  She will wish to do something to help and,
therefore, could accept more pain than she should.  For that matter, have you even
discussed with her how to stop accepting it?”

“Yes, actually, I did.  I also only agreed to take her as a witness if she would be the last of
those that volunteered.  It should never reach her.”

“Merdwin, I do not think you are aware of how tightly Lantash and I are bound.  When the
rite was conducted, there were many additional ties that…”

“I know, Kataya, I was there, although I could not bring myself to preside.  I saw what
happened.”

She nodded.  “I believe you should talk to Daniel and Lantash, as well as anyone else that
is standing witness.  Please tell me some of our own priests are going to be standing for
him.”

Merdwin smiled for the first time in several hours.  “Yes, Kataya, there are several.”  He
sobered, as he said, “Unfortunately, both Daniel and Samantha insisted on being primes,
even though I explained quite graphically what will happen.  Neither was willing to give
up what they considered their places as the Soulmates of each of you.”  He shrugged in
resignation, continuing, “I imagine Jack and Teal’c are doing their best to dissuade at
least Daniel.  They will not be able to get to Samantha.  I put Janet last, and we must
hope we do not get to her.  The other primes are Jacob, Selmak, and Seraphynara.  
Gwennetha and Garwynthia are seconds as are Malek and Brialek.  I was beginning to
believe that the four of them, that is, Daniel, Jacob, Malek, and Brialek would come to
blows before they could settle on who would be primes.  Malek is still very unhappy at the
outcome; however, Selmak used his status as a council member and elder to overrule him
and Brialek.  They finally agreed to take second tier, but as I stated, Malek is rather
distressed about the outcome.”  

“I am sorry,
Amat Wyn; I could not talk any of them out of it.  Seraphynara and
Gwennetha were more polite than the men were, but they also had an altercation as to
who would stand as prime.  In the end, they threw stones to see who would acquire the
position of prime; Gwennetha lost.  She was not happy, but stood by the decision,” he
explained.

Kataya snorted delicately, “When she does things like that, Merdwin, she is very obviously
your daughter.”  

He grinned, unrepentant, and continued with the original topic under discussion, “You
are still very weak, and you may pass out easily, so it is as well that you have the
priestesses with you.  At least Lantash has not been under as much stress as you have.  
However, I believe he is unaware of the weakness that fighting to keep the pain contained
and away from Martouf has engendered.  It is probably just as well that at least three of
his main witnesses are Tok’Ra, for the symbiote will be able to endure more than an
unblended human could,” Merdwin frowned, as he contemplated Lantash’s probable
weakness.

“In other words,” Kataya answered him, “Neither of us is in optimum condition to undergo
the rite.  Neither should we wait longer.”  

She looked at him for a moment, before saying, “I believe that since Lantash has agreed,
and we have said what we needed to say to one another, that the bleeding has slowed
considerably.  It is not gone, but neither is it as bad as it was prior to our talk.  The pain,
also, has lessened.  If it has lessened for me, then it will also have lessened for Lantash,”
she said calmly.  

“I am glad to hear that because, although we did what we could, Kataya, short of putting
you into a living death, there is nothing more the priests or priestesses can do.  As quickly
as we managed to heal you, as soon as we ceased our efforts, it began over again.  At least
it was starting from a completely healed point, and if you believe it has slowed, then I am
not in as much trepidation about performing the rite as I was.  The priests with Lantash
now have instructions to do a healing for him.  You will both be in better condition than I
had expected, and for that I am thankful.”  

Merdwin paused for a moment, before saying, “Kataya, I am sorry that you must go
through this, and I wanted to tell you that,” he stopped and cleared his throat, and then
tried again.  “You were correct to refuse me a formal joining or entwining.  I would never
have forgiven myself if you had agreed and we had ended thus.  It is one thing to go
through it with someone whom you love as deeply as you do Lantash, but it would not
have been fair for you to have to go through it with me.  I realize that now.”

“I love you, also,
Coeurawyn, just as deeply as I love Lantash.  Have you never noticed
that when I am in trouble, I always turn to you first?  I am afraid you are stuck with my
love for eternity, just as Lantash and Daniel are.  It is not an unhappy thing to
contemplate,” Kataya said, her voice soft with her love of him.

Kissing him lightly on the cheek, she turned to go in search of the priestesses to have the
healing rite done, so she could prepare for the
Sevesh Lok Twin.  She had done what she
could.  Now, she would expect the worst, but hope for the best.  

TBC





             
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Blood of My Heart, Beloved of My Soul

Chapter Thirty-three

A Lover's Good-bye